Partly because he was actually quite funny and partly because he made it through the gauntlet and didn’t back down. No votes so far! Makes me feel comfortable that you’re wearing masks. View all posts by Don Roy King. All of you mother fuckers. So, why don’t you shut up, sit down next to me and take your talking to. Fucking goddamn losers. With my SUV in my heated seats. [Bill Burr walks in and to the stage] [cheers and applause] Speaker Bill Burr: Thank you. That’s what you did. You’re listening to the egg heads, the people who we all cheated off of in high school, right? It aint’ ever happening. All of you collectively SUCK a FUCKIN DICK. I’m fuckin standing here. Jesus Christ the goddamn people on this show are givin me shit. Bunch of goddamn pansies. Fuck all you motherfuckers and fuck the Flyers. Additionally, he has been nominated for thirteen DGA Awards and won in 2014, 2016, 2017, 2018 and 2019. Someone tell him calling women "bitches" isn't funny #SNL Fuck all of you and fuck the liberty bell, and shove it up Ben Franklin’s ass. Comedy is not for you. Why don’t ya just get the fuckin Ice Capades down there you assholes. It’s great. Didn’t have that when I was a kid. The Netflix star referred to white women as his “bitches” while claiming … I do 3 minutes. However, Burr would not let the crowd get him like they did the previous acts and kept hammering the audience until some started to turn in his favor. It's 2020. Bunch of goddamn fucking losers. Goddamn lawn seats. Grandma! Went to the Banana Republic, picked a 20 dollar shirt off the rack. This is probably the funniest SNL Monologue in a long time and it is no surprise that it offended the Twitter community. You and your fuckin Donovan McNabb shirt. I hope you go 0-15. You fucking one bridge having piece of shit city that no one gives a fuck about. Thank you. Each and every one of you and somehow they just keep repeatedly cumming right in your fucking eyeballs, so that it builds up so much that your eyes fucking crust over. I’m like, “What’s going on? SNL's Bill Burr / Jack White Monologue | Saturday Night Live SNL's Today 10/10/2020 What’s that sir? That’s not bad 12 minute rant. And speaking of dreams come true, did you see Rick Moranis got sucker punched on the Upper West side? Listen, I don’t want to speak ill of my bitches here, okay? That’s what happens when you stick in M&M’s store at Time Square. I hope the glass gets fuckin into your fuckin shoulder blades and then I see you afterwards “Hey how’s it going” [simulates slapping a good friend in the back] Enjoy the fuckin show? They’re trying to cancel John Wayne. That’s good. Then come up with jokes designed to prove that point. Thank you. And then somehow white women swung their Gucci booted feet over the fence of oppression and stuck themselves at the front of the line. Play the fucking records. I SAID SUCK A DICK. Suck a dick. Required fields are marked *. It’s June. Sam Morril compares wearing a condom to doing volunteer work, wonders if murderers critique each other’s work and recalls befriending a vigilante in Cleveland. who told bill burr he, a straight white man, should try to tackle homophobia and racism in the worst way possible in his snl monologue — ً (@wyattswoods) October 11, 2020 Me listening to Bill Burr again, let me say this, there's absolutely no need to call white women bitches, because I rock with at least 47% of white women. Maybe I wouldn’t have a bunch of cunts not fuckin paying attention 4 hours into a goddamn show. Bill Burr: Snl Monologue (2020) – Transcript November 5, 2020 Host Bill Burr does stand-up about the COVID-19 pandemic, cancel culture and the "woke" white women. How did they get all the June? You guys were phenomenal [Crowd Cheers] Oh no.. Right? “My life is so hard. White women, you’re amazing. The next day somebody’s mopping up the 3 pounds of fucking brains that are actually left in this goddamn crowd. This gotta be fucking ridiculous. New York is back. City started looking like a giant Bed Bath & Beyond, and then bam! That I really feel great. So, I haven’t been in New York for about a year. You fucking assholes. Thank you very much. That’s the first time I said cunt. Get the peep show back in Time Square, old people can walk safely 40 blocks away. Ploughing ahead, let’s talk white women here. I’m like, “Some people not using safe sex and making all these babies?” So, I finally walked up to this old New York door guy and I was just like, “Dude, what’s going on? Sun goes down at 4 in the afternoon. Bill Burr had an amazing monologue on "Saturday Night Live." He ripped cancel culture coming for John Wayne and woke white women. Look at this. It's 2020. You have no idea what it’s like to be me.” Trashing white guys. 1 month ago I heard some rumblings that this was some ghastly meltdown or highly controversial. Original air date: October 10, 2020 Host Bill Burr does stand-up about the COVID-19 pandemic, cancel culture and white You’re all gonna get fuckin cancer which is fantastic because all your fucking heads are shaved anyway no one’s even gonna notice. How stupid is that cancel thing? You guys all look like surgeons with your masks on. They’re all up in arms. What brilliant shit are you gonna fuckin tell me? I hate the way you eat with your little shitty ass subway. Alright? Weekend Update: Brett Kavanaugh and Dr. Ford Testify: Season 44 Episode 1, Weekend Update on the Government Shutdown, SNL Transcripts: Tom Brady: 04/16/05: Tom Brady’s Falafel City, SNL Transcripts: Chris Pratt: 09/27/14: NFL on CBS. Bunch of racist fucking morons. I don’t care. Fucking assholes. These are equator people. Bring Tug McGraw back from the dead you fucking jackasses. Thank you. Ah! You don’t know who the fuck he is. That’s great. I had to buy a fuckin shirt for this shit. Remember that had that whole season when they wore the slacks. #SNL — Lori (@LoriAndJava) October 11, 2020 Bill Burr's opening monologue is just obnoxious and misogynstic. And it was about that for about 8 seconds. Fucking standing backstage for 3 hours to get booed by this GED fuckin stupid-ass piece of shit fuckin crowd. Suck a fuckin dick. 52 fuckin hours into a show. Go fuck yourselves. Suck a dick. God I hope mass aids, full blown, like fuckin you get weak as you walk to your fuckin car and you just pass out and they just find you next to your ’83 Fucking Monte Carlo with gravel imbedded into the fuckin side of your bald ass fuckin head. You got fuckin Joe Frazier is from there but he’s black so you can’t fuckin deal with him, so you make a fucking statue for some 3 ft fuckin Italian you stupid philly cheese-eatin fucking jackasses. Saturday marked his first time hosting SNL, and it's fair to say it's divided opinion. It’s gonna be amazing. What’s left, the Phillies that faggot ass team named named after a female horse. Don’t worry. Also wtf is he talking about white women? Oh!” I didn’t know that. That work has earned him nine Emmys and thirteen nominations. That’s a fucking record. Give them the sun for 31 days. So anyways back to the joke. They get 28 days of overcast weather. Fucking antennas go right in your fucking ears. About Press Copyright Contact us Creators Advertise Developers Terms Privacy Policy & Safety How YouTube works Test new features 4 minutes left To fuckin talk about you CUNTS. 3 minutes left of this motherfuckin tirade. That felt great. How about you hook them up with July? That’s what these people sounded like.” You never talk to your grandparents and brought up the wrong subject? You people are on goddamn acid. This is probably the funniest SNL Monologue in a long time and it is no surprise that it offended the Twitter community. You have a soccer team? [He looks around for the camera, then he’s pointing at the camera.] Have a good night. I am so excited to be here. He was born in 1907. Here's why. I just blow all your fuckin brains out. Do they even fuckin exist anymore? Sir why are you screaming? Bill Burr Tackles Cancel Culture For His ‘SNL’ Debut, While ‘The Fly’ Has Jim I hope you all get in your Ford Focuses and fucking drive off the side of that faggot ass Ben Franklin bridge. I have a little fuckin cane now. What are you taking a picture of E-Rock? What do you have to say sir? I don’t. I’ll probably get canceled for doing that joke. 7 MINUTES left. All rights reserved. I got one first. All of yas…can line up with your Harold Carmichael fuckin jerseys, and one at a time you can all suck my dick. Bill Burr's opening monologue is just obnoxious and misogynstic. I hate this fuckin city. Yes. He said things that we avoid talking about in … Listen. That night Burr became the tamer of unruly audiences and earned an incredible amount of respect from comedians and working class audiences that now adore him. I’m gonna finish my set by takin this mic stand base like a fuckin disc. Stand-up comic and former “Breaking Bad” actor Bill Burr has ignited a Twitter firestorm — for mocking everyone from white women to gays in his … The universe has to balance itself. Thank you. 6 Minutes left and I will be selling my CD after this shit you mother fuckers [CHEERS] and the only way one you’re getting one is if I throw one at your fuckin stupid heads. Who’s he your dad or something? The Flyers. City of Brotherly Love. I’m gonna be the little observational comedian here. 2 MINUTES LEFT. You don’t bring up race or religion with your grandparents. It’s like, god did that 40 years ago. What do you want? I’m getting paid to shit all over you guys and your stupid fucking rock t-shirts of bands that no one gives a fuck about. For a group of people that were never enslaved? I hope that happens to you. You bunch of faggots. The nerve of you white women. That’s all I got left. 0% body fat. Does it really have to come to this? Yo – I’m seguewaying into my next joke. BILL BURR: SNL MONOLOGUE (2020) – TRANSCRIPT Host Bill Burr does stand-up about the COVID-19 pandemic, cancel culture and the “woke” white women. Transcript of the "Philadelphia incident" where comedian Bill Burr went on a 12-minute tirade attacking the audience after the previous act was heckled heavily by the crowd. Yeah! And I’m gonna laugh at your fucking funerals which is gonna be great. What’s that? And I was getting all claustrophobic. Wearing a grey face covering, the 52-year-old comedian hosted the second episode of … Bill Burr scores valid points on canceling the crop while trying to cancel ALL IN SIGHT. What the fuck am I gonna do at this point. I’d grab you buy the fuckin hair but you don’t have any. If you’re that dumb and you wanna kill your own family members, by all means, do it. Someone tell him calling women 'bitches' isn't funny,” wrote one commenter on Twitter. Ploughing ahead. I like people who wear masks. Larry the Cable Guy is back to Git R Done. You haven’t won a SuperBowl since they had facemasks. That’s what I do. Be the first to rate this post. You bunch of fuckin cocks. Tank tops! The nerve… where’s the camera at? And then if you don’t wear a mask, that doesn’t bug me either. Your fucking Rush T-Shirts that say I beat the shit out of my girlfriends. What’s that sir? New York is back, baby. Fuck all of you. There’s too many people. Things went south when the tour came to the Philadelphia. Yes. Yeah, the audience isn't full of Bill Burr fans like a normal show he would do. Bill Burr's SNL monologue was funny and appropriate. Roland Gabriel running around without a fuckin helmet. What about not fucking interrupting me you jackass. All of you go fuck yourselves in your own assholes. You guys stood by us toxic white males through centuries of our crimes against humanity, you rolled around in the blood money and occasionally when you wanted to sneak off and hook up with a black dude, if you got caught you said it wasn’t consensual. Alright listen I’m out of time. And this has always been a life long dream of mine to come here and host Saturday Night Live. And I’m doin ALL FUCKING SEVEN. I got your mothers. Fucking Rocky is your hero. It ain’t ever fuckin happen. I really hope that happens. Shall we? Two guys kissing. Your email address will not be published. I figure anyone who gets into an SNL taping is connected some how and there for the experience. everything’s just pressed up, you can’t see anything. I was shooting a movie. You got a fuckin ping pong team? Speaker Bill Burr: Thank you. They’re going after dead people now. - LinkedIn Things went south when the tour came to the Philadelphia. Someone tell him calling women "bitches" isn't funny It's 2020. Fall out of one of those piece of shit buildings. “Bill Burr's opening monologue is just obnoxious and misogynstic. It’s a dream come true. It’s literally a dream come true. That’s what you did. Anyway, I don’t know. Bunch of fucking losers. Burr then spent his 12 minute set picking apart every thing about the city from its food, its sports teams, its icons, all while receiving boos from the audience. Fucking warehouse working, weed smoking, fucking disappointment to your mother. That’s what I learned. There’s gay black people, they can celebrate from June 1st, July 31st, 61 days of celebrating. Stops you from reproducing. Dude, black people were actually enslaved, they get February. But let’s go back in history here, okay? Nobody wants to go on the parade. Bill Burr didn't hold back in his controversial opening " Saturday Night Live " monologue. Like, “Why is it so crowded?” “It’s gay pride month.” “Oh! Booing Dom Irerra. I broke the mic stand. I hope somebody takes a fuckin beer stein and just slaps you in the back of your zit infested fucking shoulders and your awful man tits hang. © 2020 Scraps from the Loft. The one fuckin kid that would actually go to college in this fucking crowd. I have been doing stand-up forever. The reaction to what he said undergirds white supremacy. [boos] And all of a sudden it went off the rails like, “Oh! … Can you believe that?” It’s like, “Yeah. I figure anyone who gets into an SNL taping is connected some how and there for the experience. And then somebody gives you that little nugget of information that just pulls it back? 2 to the back of the head. From the jump, the unruly Philly crowd set the tone of the night by booing the first comedian off the stage and then proceeded to give hell to all other comedians on the bill. [applause] Thank you. We got a great show for you guys everybody. He’s not here. Because a … #billburr #snl Never passed the fuckin 8th grade. Read the transcript of Bill Burr stand-up monologue at the Saturday Night Live in October 2020. Larry the Cable Guy – Remain Seated (2020) – Transcript, Craig Ferguson: Just Being Honest (2015) – Transcript, Kevin Hart: Zero F**ks Given (2020) – Transcript, Sam Morril: I Got This (2020) – Transcript. Wow, thank you. Viewers may know Burr for playing Patrick Kuby in Breaking Bad, although he has also fronted comedy podcast The Monday Morning Podcast since 2007. The full transcript of Bill’s monologue at the SNL is now available. I hope I hit a baby in the fuckin head. Bill Burr's "SNL" opening monologue received mixed reactions, but the comedian's fans were already prepared for his blunt comedic style. Comedian Bill Burr's SNL monologue addressed everything from coronavirus and being 'woke' to gay pride and cancel culture, noting he'd probably be 'canceled' after his opening jokes. I gotta tell you, the way white women somehow hijacked the ‘woke’ movement, generals around the world should be analyzing this. Bill Burr is exactly the comic we DON‘T NEED RIGHT NOW. I come out here with a fuckin gun, hollow tip bullets, and I just start fuckin shooting people. I don’t know. Huh? I’ve never heard so much complaining in my life from white women. OK. Everyone’s chained to their fuckin chairs and just start blowing your fucking brains out. They’re literally running out of people to cancel. I guess my grandparents were older. I had a great time with Judd Apatow, Pete Davidson and all the guys. Fuckin boo me 9 hrs. 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